


A Hundred Rumour War

by kuchi



Series: Heartlines [3]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/M, Humor, M/M, Multi, News Media, Pre-Poly, yes it's zutaraang gossip from the POV of the tabloids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-05-02 09:57:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19196548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuchi/pseuds/kuchi
Summary: Republic City's respectable news establishments struggle against scandalous alternative narratives concerning the tumultuous love lives of the Avatar, his longtime love, and a certain Fire Lord that comes between them.





	A Hundred Rumour War

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this 100% to entertain myself. thanks to jaystrifes, greenbucket, and guileheroine for helping me flesh out my scrappy ideas :) 
> 
> Set roughly a couple of years before the main fic!

After a steady few years of publication, the  _Harmony Herald_  was the most trustworthy source of Republic City gossip. In fact, all the gossip magazines that made up the small (but substantial, speaking in terms of profit) part the City press had settled into a comfortable routine of conjecture about the Avatar and friends. After all, it hadn't taken long for it to become clear that nothing sold papers like the juicy personal lives of spry, young twenty-somethings, especially those who were revered heroes of the Hundred Year War. Though it had to be admitted that  _revered_ was not the first word that would come to mind upon reading the lurid detail of some of these stories.

What the columns lacked in reverence, however, they made up for with the sheer force of investigative imagination. While one house painstakingly ran a covert investigation into the secret harem organisation that served a front by the name of the Kyoshi Warriors, and another was busy lovingly crafting the details of the personality of each lover taken by the elusive Chief of Police, only for their efforts to be made null when she was spotted with a new face the next month; nothing drew more attention than the tragic, and tragically inevitable, demise of the relationship between the Avatar and his longtime love Katara, the hero and heroine of the War.

For how many years their legendary bond had been dwindling, no one was quite sure; the timeline pushed itself forward to retain legitimacy every few months. But one thing was for certain: the culprit. It was the dark and dangerous charm of the leader of the Fire Nation that was the reason for the breakdown of such a steadfast relationship. For who could resist the mysterious Fire Lord? A man whose shadowy history was ripe and uncharted terrain for the tabloids, yet managed to be overshadowed by the intriguing relationship with his closest companions.

And  _everyone_  knew that no one was closer to him than one Master Katara, the girlfriend of the Avatar. This undeniable fact had only one enemy – those so misguided by the disgraceful gossip column of  _Five Nations_ that they dared to believe that it was the Avatar himself who was more suited to the fascinating Fire Lord's tastes. But it would not be long before the truth came out.

 

***

" _Who?_ "

Katara peered forward at the magazine on the stand before her before lifting a hand to stifle her laughter. Squeezed between the glossy lettering that stamped  _FIVE NATIONS WEEKLY_ across the top of the page, and the main story, a rags-to-riches story about an earthbending entrepreneur, was a sketch of very familiar faces by a very familiar turtle-duck pond.

The accompanying text was… illuminating.

"Aang and  _Zuko_ ," she repeated to her companion. "It's about him visiting the Palace."

The Chief of Police barked a short laugh. "Are you surprised? That's always been the first choice for most of the rags in this City."

Eyes wide in amusement, Katara keenly skimmed the contents of the headline before flipping up the page to find the full story. "Really? I thought Zuko and  _I_ were star-crossed lovers," she said seriously.

"Maybe you are in the older papers, but you know we like it a little more salacious downtown."

"That makes sense,' Katara muttered, unfazed. "They spent a  _lot_  of time here together."

"It's the home team," Toph said, nodding knowingly, as if this explained the suggested love affair perfectly. "So, what did Twinkletoes do to break your heart?"

Katara couldn't help her laughter as her eyes roved over the story. "Oh, this is  _devastating_ , Toph." She clutched a hand over her heart - earning a strange look from the shopkeeper - and cleared her throat, stumbling over the words through her giggles. "What did I ever do to deserve this?"

"I'm buying it," Toph said, deciding in that instant that it must have been worth it. "Read it to me, Sugar Queen."

And read it she did. It was a surprisingly sunny day amongst recent smog-ridden ones, and the two friends sat next to the stall, sipping mango juice as Katara read. It would have been impossible for any bystander to tell what myriad of emotions had been going through the poor woman's mind as she read of her own boyfriend's betrayal, but Toph, sitting next to her, could see it all.

Their laughter echoed in the busy street, taking in the sheer absurdity of the details lying Katara's lap. Toph noticed the quickening of her friend's heartbeat. Finally, Katara slapped the paper into her lap and said airily, "That's  _something_." The gleeful interest in her voice - a far cry from the hatchings of the vengeful plan of a woman scorned, it had to be said - intrigued even the aloof Chief of Police.

"Well, that's the most entertaining bullshit I've heard in a while," Toph said with finality. "Can we buy another?"

   

 

> **AVATAR AANG SPOTTED SNEAKING PAST PALACE GUARDS YET AGAIN**
> 
> _Sources claim that Healer Katara heartbroken - the one thing she cannot mend is her own heart!_
> 
> The Avatar has once more been observed bypassing the usual stringent checks of the Fire Nation Royal Palace and directly flying on his glider to the Fire Lord's private wing. While not uncommon, the increasing regularity of this occurrence has given pause to some. The brazen nature of these visits cannot be ignored, especially with the speculation mounting regarding the dissolution of the Avatar's own relationship with his childhood love.
> 
> It's almost certain that the secretive nature of these trysts means there is something lurking deeper than the uncommonly close partnership the two have cultivated since the end of the War. Is the Avatar seeking the counsel of a close friend in these trying times? Or is there something more? 
> 
> Evidence certainly points to the latter - our sources in Republic City have recounted how Katara recently stormed out of a meeting with Fire Lord Zuko in tears. It's not hard to imagine that she would be reeling from a broken heart, and the confrontation was simply too much.
> 
> Anyway, back to the secret couple. This is the third time in two months that the Avatar has been spotted surreptitiously entering his lover's private quarters. He has no problem using the regular entrance with larger parties, so it's safe to say that something of a forbidden nature is occurring! Will the Avatar and the Fire Lord ever go public with their love? We believe it is only a matter of time until all comes to light!
> 
> _*Flip to page 6 to read about the shocking tension between Aang and Katara on Air Temple Island last week._

 

***

At least the reports that filtered to the Water Tribes still had their sense. They took their lead from the  _Herald_ to ensure that their stories were accurate to the epic love story between their own tribeswoman and the Fire Lord. Though their articles had a flair for a distasteful colonial intrigue than no cosmopolitan at the  _Harmony Herald_ would dare to pen, the facts of the tragic affair was still intact. Despite the excessive fawning over the Fire Lord, they were allies to the truth.

And needless to say, these were  _hard_  truths to swallow for the Avatar. Shunned by his girlfriend, he was traipsing in the South with her brother, Chief Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe, while she resided in Republic City carrying out educational projects. It was no surprise they did not wish to face each other during these tempestuous times.

"Have you seen this?" Sokka waved the paper in front of Aang's face. He had just finished a long tribal meeting in time to see Aang arrive. He waited patiently until its attendants filtered out, before proceeding to bring out the most entertaining thing he had found in the market that morning. There was no need to cause panic among tribe elders - they remained partial to the Avatar, his aid during their latter War efforts at the fore of their memories. By contrast, the teenagers of the Tribe (and thus, the tabloids catering to them) were instead enamoured with the handsome, reformed, Fire Lord who had deigned to personally visit their tribe so many times.

Sokka sniggered as he let Aang take the copy of the  _Southern Enquirer_ from him and read it.

  

 

> **TENSIONS RISING LIKE HOT WATER AS KATARA SNUBS AVATAR FOR FIRE LORD IN EARTH KINGDOM CEREMONY**
> 
> _The Annual General Meeting of the Four Nations, held this year in Omashu, had its much-talked-about closing ceremony yesterday evening. But the lavish ball could not be said to end well for the Avatar. Our exclusive access to the star-studded scene shows that the Avatar's relationship, long rumoured to be deteriorating, continues to wobble on its shaky foundations._
> 
> OMASHU – Inside the Great Hall of the palace, a perfect scene is set: lines of beautiful chairs raised from the Earth seat various important figures, including Earth King Kuei at their head this year, uncharacteristically wearing a jaw-dropping green silk - a product of the Fire Nation, and a signifier of the global union. But despite the swanky surroundings, it is difficult not to address the elephant rhino in the room: the Avatar and friends, always guests of honour, are scattered far from each other. It is no doubt a tense display of the precarious situation between Aang and Katara. While the Avatar can be seen chatting animatedly with King Bumi and other locals, seemingly heedless to the affair, his girlfriend has cozied up to the Fire Lord.
> 
> Regular readers will know it isn't an uncommon sight - from their regular Republic City dalliances to the Fire Lord's shockingly common visits to Katara's home tribe. As we observe, the two have their heads together, talking for long minutes about something so quietly that no one around them pays them any mind. The Fire Lord almost  _smiles_. Unbeknownst to her boyfriend, Katara cannot seem to stop touching Fire Lord Zuko (and we can't blame her). A grasp of his arm, or his shoulder, or even his hand, an unnecessarily familiar move is never too far as we watch.
> 
> While things seem to be heating up for this particular star-crossed duo, we can't help but notice how this leaves the Avatar in the cold. While they can normally be seen sitting together to keep up appearances, this marks the first time that Katara and her boyfriend do not even acknowledge each other the whole event. Could this be a sign of rising tensions within their years-long relationship? Is this the confirmation of its end - and will we finally glean for how long they have been keeping up this painful facade?
> 
> Though her actions raise doubts about her honour, particularly among fans of the Avatar, it is hard to be unsympathetic to the waterbender. It has always been a mystery how the two maintained such a relationship, when the polished and darkly handsome Fire Lord has always seemed to many as the obvious choice for our heroine. A few years her elder, and the head of undeniably the most  _powerful_ nation in the world, yet it seems that the pair remain destined to remain in the shadows, doomed to silently steal glances at one another at gatherings like this one. 
> 
> At this very moment, Katara laughs in absolute delight at something Zuko says, her eyes gleaming with adoration. This earns another tempting smile from the Fire Lord, her charm enough to melt even the most exotically stoic of faces. What could be their tantalising topic of conversation...

The article continued to fawn over the scraps of interaction the reporter had caught, each gesture described with such flourish that it was almost awe-inspiring.

"Seriously? Is  _this_ really all they got out of that ceremony?" Aang said. No stranger to these rumours - a piece like this would have caused him considerable distress in his younger days, a thought that seemed laughable in light of its  _melodrama_ \- he could hardly act surprised, though the odd intimacy of this article made him squirm more than the usual fare. He had to wonder how many members of the press at these events were there for the express purpose of stalking him and his friends, for the sole reason of gleaning their romantic intentions and writing about it in uncomfortably familiar terms. It was a little scary.

"Oh man," Sokka said, slapping the table in his laughter. They both remembered this particular ceremony clearly - and the simple fact that a seating arrangement could be construed as evidence for his sister's unfaithfulness to her number one guy was hilarious to Sokka. He wondered how these papers would react if they knew that his first girlfriend had turned into the moon.  _Could a mortal ever compare to the ethereal tragedy of his first love?_ Suki probably would never catch a break again.

"This is the same event where Bosco ate the whole dessert selection for a couple hundred people, and the Northern Chief  _accidentally_  called us 'deficient'. I've gotta see Zuko's reaction to this."

Aang laughed, perfunctory, his mind still on the dramatised descriptions of the pair in question. "They really do think he's- in some kind of  _doomed romance_  with Katara?"

They both glanced at the paper again. It was safe to say it knew its audience - between the infatuated descriptions of Zuko's dashing good looks and his polished, regal composure ( _that_ was a good laugh) Aang wasn't sure what the subject of this was article supposed to be.

Sokka nodded sagely, barely containing his giggles. "I mean, he  _is_ older," he said. "And you could say -  _hotter_  - eh," he elbowed Aang.

"Yeah," Aang said, the word drawn out by bewilderment. He glanced at it again.

_...the two have their heads together, talking for long minutes about something so quietly that no one around them pays them any mind. The Fire Lord almost smiles..._

What Sokka didn't notice was that his friend was struck in that moment by an exceptional feeling of longing, next to him.

The article - the  _context_  - was embellished wildly, of course. But take that away, and it  _did_  sound like them. If the scene pictured, of Katara and Zuko close and conversing happily, was supposed to make him jealous, or as the article had put it,  _left in the cold_ , it had something of the effect it desired. It made him miss the two of them like crazy.

Which shouldn't really happen, not when he saw them just two days ago. And especially not with regards to Zuko, who was not his girlfriend.

He had no excuse when Sokka gave him a strange glance for his silence, turning swiftly on the air and changing the subject to the meeting Sokka had just finished.

 

***

The Fire Nation press had no journalistic integrity, unlike the _Herald_ 's Republic City rivals which at least had the good sense to stick to one story. They did not seem to care about the truth in any form, instead gleefully publishing whatever drivel came their way. As such, they would run the competing narratives about their leader side by side - the epic love affair with Master Katara, and that nonsense regarding the Avatar - as if these claims did not contradict each other.

Of course, no one could blame them. Royal gossip had always been a pillar amongst the Nation's pettiest forms of entertainment, though traditionally, in ages gone by, rumours spread by word of mouth. A published format simply sped up the process. A few years back, one could count on the scandalous meetings between Princess Azula and the son of whatever visiting dignitary was offering their son for marriage into the Royal Family for a good story. Rumours would quickly spread of some poor young Lord gravely injured by the Princess - verbally or physically. Even a shrewd reader had trouble identifying the Press' falsified insults from the Princess' real ones. It was the rare instance where it was hard for even the scummiest gossipers to conjure something crueller than reality.

Now, with their golden celebrity under strict surveillance and stricter curfews, the nation's tabloids suffered. Fire Lord Zuko kept an annoyingly close rein on his public relations - though no one could blame him for that either. Anyone caught broaching the subject would be met with a "that's irrelevant" or "none of your business" and even his barely concealed contempt at such attempts stopped making interesting news after the first few times.

So it was understandable, really, that they would jump on rumours circulated by others, with no attempts at novelty. The Fire Lord was currently face to face with such pathetic excuses for journalism, and reacted appropriately.

He let out a long-suffering sigh, catching his breath in the middle of a tirade. "And they're both using the  _same_ picture," he said, his tone incredulous. "How much more ridiculous could this be?"

His adviser gave him an unimpressed look. Laid in front of them were two papers with the same sketch of Katara entering the gates to the private wing of the Palace, sold by the 'artist' to both the  _Daily Dragon_  and  _Heat_. Zuko wondered warily how many more would turn up. One headline proclaimed that Katara was thrilled to be on her way to meet with Zuko, elaborating on the torturous time they were forced to spend apart as each undertook their duties and kept strong public faces for their global onlookers. The other was a thinly veiled insinuation that she was preparing to lash out at Zuko for  _stealing her boyfriend._

Both were outrageous to Zuko. They made him want to flip the table, incited an irrational desire to burn the papers in front of him to shreds. Mostly, they made him wish that Mai and his Uncle were  _not_  in the room with him right now.

Prince Iroh chuckled. "It is all a bit of fun," he said. "You should have seen the things they wrote about me after I returned from Ba Sing Se," he said humorously.

Mai blinked, inspecting her nails. Ever since she had deigned to return to the Capital to act as an adviser of the court (she was shrewd enough to know Zuko needed as many decent people on his side as possible, whether that included awkward exes or not) she had yet to see a tantrum like the ones in their teenage years. But this was pretty close.

" _Exactly._  Why does this bother you? There's another paper out right now calling for your head, and Aang's. Shouldn't you be more worried about that?"

Zuko huffed. They didn't understand the  _insult_  - the notion repeated so casually that he would be so terrible a friend as to thoughtlessly mess with Aang and Katara's relationship. "But they have their  _reasons_  for why they hate me. It's not the same."

She sighed. "So?"

"So, this stuff  _here_  is just stupid conjecture!"

Mai shared a look with Prince Iroh across the length of the hall. "You sure that's all?" she said, shuffling her papers. Before Zuko could reply, she picked up her things and swung the door of the private meeting room and walked out into the sunshine. Formal greetings of farewell were for respectable rulers, not children.

"What is she talking about, Uncle?"

The prince gave a most ungainly shrug. "Getting so worked up about silly gossip does not make sense… unless there is some truth to it."

No one would know for years how right he was.

For now, Zuko gaped like a penguin fish. "What?! I'm not– they– I'm not having an  _affair_  with either of them!"

Iroh simply smiled to placate him - hopefully his nephew would understand from the sheer absurdity of such a thing said out loud that that was not what he was implying. He said, "I did not say you were." Then, he followed Mai out; the wisest course of action, leaving his nephew to seethe in the comfort of privacy.

 

***

The  _Harmony Herald_ 's time had come - not that they needed any more proof - when a piece of evidence surfaced in the hotel room of one Master Katara shortly after she had left the Earth Kingdom after the week of ceremony. For the lucky cleaner that had found the envelope left on the dresser it had meant a hefty amount of cash; for the Herald, it was priceless. 

  

  

> **'AANG CAN'T FIND OUT': EVIDENCE AT LAST FOR THE LOVE AFFAIR OF THE CENTURY!**
> 
> It has been long confirmed by sources within the Royal Palace and the Southern Water Tribe that Master Katara and Fire Lord Zuko regularly exchange love letters. While some have speculated as to the evidence of desperate passion that may hide within their contents, none have been located – until now. Anonymous sources in Omashu have brought to us a letter addressed from the Fire Lord to his secret flame, reprinted in FULL for your scrutiny. Though their more passionate correspondences remain a mystery, it's clear from a glance the restrained desire in his careful words. We're swooning, what do you think?!
> 
> _Katara,_
> 
> _If you're still in Ba Sing Se with him, you should stay there. I'm going to Republic City in a week so I can make the rest of the arrangements for our absence. Whatever                 happens, Aang can't find out what the plan is, he would just be annoying about it. And it's NOT funny to see me care about this stuff, come on._
> 
> _See you soon. I can't wait._
> 
> _Zuko_
> 
> Unfortunately, none of the letters following this one could be retrieved. What romantic rendezvous did the Fire Lord have in mind?!

_Unfortunately_. Zuko sighed visibly in relief. Not that there  _was_ anything worse - not that the letters he exchanged with Katara were  _bad_ in any sense in the first place. Though he could imagine how this particular message - a quick and eager scrawl outlining their plans a few months back to get them all away to the Western Air Temple as a birthday celebration of sorts for Aang - could be construed as some sort of secret meeting.  _Obviously_ , there was nothing to the effect of "desperate passion" in those letters (he could hardly look at those words, not in the least because he was hyper-aware of Aang reading them over his shoulder) and he should have nothing to hide if someone did get a hold of them.

But they were  _his._  Between him and her, and for no one else.

It seemed like there was nothing these vultures wouldn't do for a piece of degrading gossip.

He couldn't help but be angered. This particular piece had made it to more papers than usual, what with being ' _actual real evidence',_ and being in Republic City in the eye of the storm had just made it worse. He rolled his eyes. He suggested a quick trip out on the bay after meetings to clear their heads - he wasn't sure whether more for his or Aang's sake.

The water tempered them both; Aang surrounded by what was close enough to a home element, and Zuko surrounded by the distinct lack of people.

Zuko couldn't help himself but ask as he watched Aang bent over the edge of the boat, lightly guiding the wind in the waves below. "Is all the letter stuff bothering you?"

Aang mustered up a remarkably solemn look and watched as Zuko tensed. "I just can't believe you would do this to me, Zuko." He shook his head with a harrowing slowness.

Zuko felt a peal of laughter rise in his chest.

"I'm used to it, really," Aang continued. He was making a distraction. His mind whirred all day at why Zuko might be so obviously perturbed by this, but it wasn't a train of thought he could allow himself to follow without having to face certain truths about his own issues. He pressed on with what they both understood was an attempt to lighten the mood; ease the strange tension that would soon linger around them more than ever. "But they make it sound so -  _romantic._ "

Zuko sputtered.

"I mean, you never write  _me_ letters."

"Why would I write  _you_ letters? You're sneaking into my house without telling me half the time."

Aang laughed at that, raising his eyebrows at the scandal. "Don't let the press hear you say that," he said under a smile. "I wouldn't know how to tell my girlfriend that you're cheating on her."

Zuko sniggered, and sighed, resigned to his fate. The accusations on his character, unbeknownst to the papers, were so much closer (so much crueller) than they knew. "This is going to blow way out of proportion now, isn't it?"

That it did.

 

***

 

Special Issue

**FIRE AND ICE: THE STAR CROSSED COUPLE OF THE CENTURY**

_Harmony Herald_

 

Exclusive Report

**THE SECRET LOVE STORY OF THE AVATAR AND THE FIRE LORD**

_Five Nations Weekly_

 

Opinion

**How the Unity of the Fire Lord and a Waterbender Represents World Harmony More Than the Avatar Ever Could**

_Harmony Herald_

 

Royal Scoop

**FORBIDDEN SPARK: THE TRAGIC HISTORY OF THE FIRE LORD'S LOVE OF MEN AND THE AIRBENDER WHO IGNITED IT**

_The Daily Dragon_

 

Special Edition

**EVERYTHING YOU OUGHT TO KNOW ABOUT THE EXPLOSIVE BREAK UP!**

_Heat_

 

Opinion

**The Blatant Erasure of the Love of its Very Founders is a Shame to the United Republic's Professed Progressiveness**

_The Republic City Post_

 

**LETTERS ARE JUST THE BEGINNING! THE SECRET CITY TRYSTS BEHIND THE AVATAR'S BACK**

_Heat_

 

Royal Scoop

**CAPTURING THE AVATAR'S HEART?: AN EXCLUSIVE FOLLOW-UP TO THE PRESENT**

_The Daily Dragon_

 

***

Katara leapt up from the mat, almost sloshing her glass of fire whiskey. "I found one that isn't taking sides!" She flipped up the magazine to the correct page, skimming past the  _LOVERS AT WAR: TORN APART BY THE FLAMES OF BETRAYAL_  article to the one directly after it, and brought it to her boyfriend on the balcony.

 

 

 

> **TOP 20 SEXIEST MEN IN THE NATION**
> 
> NUMBER 1:  _FIRE LORD ZUKO_
> 
> While  _technically_  not a citizen of the United Republic due to being the head of another nation, we decided to give a bit of leeway - and the votes came rushing! It looks like the readers of  _Bending In Style_ have decided the fetching Fire Lord is at number one, sending all you folks into a frenzy. While it's impossible to know which half of the world's most famous couple has his heart (we're sure it's one of them!), he, dear readers, certainly has yours.

Aang listened in growing surprise as she read out the contents of the article. Despite the lack of speculation about which one of them was caught up in the now-cliched secret love affair, the focus remained the same: Zuko being too irresistible for his own good.

He smirked across the railing at Katara, who was already struggling not to laugh between her words. The  _one_  person they knew that cared the least possible about this kind of thing, branded as the unanimous heartthrob of their generation. This was  _never_  not going to be funny.

"Is he really  _that_  good looking?"

Katara stared at him pointedly, quirking her brow. Aang  _definitely_  knew his own answer to that, or at least a drunk version of him usually did. Her lips twitched. Maybe he needed a reminder.

"Okay, yeah," Aang said finally, to the sky.

Katara nodded to the ground, lips twisting into an unwantedly sincere smile. "Yup, I see it too.  _Number one in the nation,_ " she adopted a dreamy tone.

Aang feigned hurt with a hand to his chest. "Not counting you, obviously," she said, rolling her eyes and slinging an arm around his neck.

Katara sipped her drink and felt his heartbeat, loud against her ear.

"Okay, but he really is kind of gorgeous, isn't he?" Aang blurted. "If you ignore the fact that it's Zuko, right? I'm not imagining it?"

Katara almost choked on her drink. "Nope, definitely not." She sprang away from him again. It was too hot, close. She stared at the skyline below, pausing to sigh before she took another sip. "I wonder if we'll ever find out which one of us is really having an affair with Zuko?"

"I hope it's me. Otherwise I'm totally jealous."

Katara could drink to that.

 

***

Zuko felt faint before he could finish reading out the headline.

Katara couldn't hold back her gasp. "That's… that's… new, at least."

"Should we be, uh, expecting more of this as the press gets bigger?" Aang said nervously.

"It's just gossip," Toph drawled. "Looking for new angles, tale as old as time." She snorted. "Clearly their poor brains are just too tired from figuring out which one of you is fraternising with the Fire Lord. I like this one best. I think it's actually the nicest they've been to you all."

At this point, Zuko's own brain was halfway to reconfiguring itself to plead with her to shut up, when to his surprise - to  _all_  their surprise - he was beaten to it. Aang laughed too loud, a 'that's ridiculous' falling hastily from his lips while Katara indignantly blurted " _Toph,_ " and glared bashfully at her friend.

Knowing this would get her nowhere, Toph turned to the final member of their party. "Sokka," she urged. "What does it say?"

Sokka cleared his throat importantly, adopting a tone far too scholarly for the contents of the article. It was a long one, a " definitive analysis" in its own words, and it covered many a salacious topic before turning to the astonishing concluding claims featured in its headline "Hmm… scandal, cheating, grave news for the continuation of the airbending gene, cucko– okay, ew, didn't need to read that  _-_ ah. Here we are. A nice summary."

 **A TALE OF**   _ **THREE** _ **LOVERS? THE MOUNTING EVIDENCE WE'VE ALL BEEN IGNORING!**


End file.
